A Tribute to my late Tok Azam & Tok Naung

Wasn’t in a good mood yesterday.. still have a bit of that feeling today. Then in the morning, everything was ok, until almost all of us got slammed by our boss.. must be a PMS or sumthin’2.. but she slammed us for a good reason though, coz we were unknowledeable on a few topics… haha.. padan muke.. but takkan nk understand semue bende in a few days kan .. Rome wasn’t build in a day. But I guess she eventually cooled off, because of muke blur kitorg.. tros die explain pelan2.. hehehe.

Anyway, a VIP came this afternoon, after lunch. Velda called me to come down from lunch asap, coz Adeline wanted to introduce him to all of us. So, when I came down, the PB Room was filled with people, plus 2 noticeable old guys.. who reminded me of my late Tok Azam. I sat down at my place, and while doing some work, got to hear the concversation the guests was having with Adeline. I overheard him talking about how in the old days he would go see horse races and stuff here n there, which caught my attention, coz Tok Azam used to like to do those stuff too.. plus that VIP seriously reminded me of him.

So as he was about to leave, I gave him my business card, and he asked which part of the royal family I was from, and I told him, Perak.. and he asked me a few other questions bout that side of the family. It was then which I asked, “Out of curiosity sir, do you happen to know my late grandfather, Dato Seri Raja Azam??” and he automatically replied with a hand gesture of a person taking a photo, and said.. yes, I know your grandfather.. he loves to take pictures and has a camera with him all the time. And he repeated the snapshot gesture… I smiled as widely as I could.

Then a huge smile went thru my face the whole time thinking about that.. even as I am typing this. I mean.. after all these years, ppl still remember Tok Azam.. and when mentioned him, they’ll remember Tok Naung as well.. as the ‘angel on earth with lotsa curls’ lady. Or 'the Beautiful one..'

It's still a suprise.. Tok Azam has past away for about 9 years now, and Tok Naung, left us 18 years ago, and people still remember them. There is still that sense of happiness from people when they mention both my late grandparents name. It's a suprise to see, how many lives they both touched during their years of living.

I remember Tok Azam to be a very stern and 'garang' grandpa.. but as the years went by, he became mellow and more loving. He took the initiative to get closer to his children and gradchildren, a thing he seldom did during his career life. I remember there was this one time, he tried to get one of the race horse he owned, for me.. but sadly, the horse was sold.. too late for negotiation. I remembered how even though how funny a joke was, all that came out from his mouth was "HEH!".. He didn't have a funny bone.. everyone was laughing like mad, but all tha came out from him was "HEH!"... Then there was a time when one of my cousin, Nazrin, died, just a few months prior to Tok Azam's death. Tok Azam was crying, wouldn't eat.. it was then where it showed how much he actually loved his grandchildren.

I was there, holding his feet, during the his few last breaths.. I could remember the sudden chill that went thru his legs, when he breathe his last breath, I could remember the face of my mom n my auntie at that exact moment... I could remember me running down, screaming to my cousin... saying "Tok Azam dah xdee..." and there was a wedding at the neigbours house.. it was a sad moment, though I had to say it was amusing to see, the guests from the wedding beside the house, suddenly changed faces, when they saw me screaming n running towards my cousin.. all of them stopped and sat still.. but the neigbours n the caterers were kind enough to make a last minute preparation of the kenduri for us that night.

I was never close to Tok Azam.... only a few years up to his death, when he started softening up, that me n my cousins were brave enough to get close to him. There were times, that even if we terlanggar kerusi.. we would almost cry, because we were afraid that he would scold us.. yeah.. he was that strict... but generous nevertheless..

I have a blurred memory of my times with Tok Naung... she died when I was 7, and I just came back from US then... so more the less, I only spend like 3 years of my life with her. But I remembered that she was of course, undeniably an angel on earth. She has never once scolded, yet alone raise her voice to any of her children as well as her grandchildren... There's a few times, from what I can remember, where If I was scolded by mommy, Tok Naung would actually defend me... I could though, remember the time when she started to get her first stroke, and a few months before that, when she came to sleep at our house during Puasa of 1990... she was admitted a week after that, because of the stroke and other diabetic complications.. and our Raya that year, was mostly spent in the hospital, until her dying day. I remembered that day clearly... me n momm was at home in Subang Jaya at that time.. having just resting after dinner. When mommy got a phone call from my uncle, who said that Tok Naung's condition was critical, and she should come to the hospital right away. Daddy was off shore, so Daddy's youngest sister, Auntie Zariah, and her husband came to pick us up. As soon as we arrived the hospital, it was too late. Tok Naung was gone.. Mommy was crying so much that time.. We just came back from the US for about 4 months, so mommy didn't really get the chance to 'hilangkan rasa manja' with Tok Naung.. that was what hurt her most I guess.. Almost everyone we knew cried when Tok Naung left us... she was someone everyone loved.. there was almost no one who hated her or envied her..

Mommy often told me, that a few months after her death, everytime I got a scolding from mommy, I would often cry and call Tok Naung's name, till I fell to sleep... That's when mommy felt guilty, and hurriedly 'pujuk' me..

Both Tok Azam and Tok Naung were great people... They've helped a lot of people, loved a lot of people, and made a lot of people into a successful, kind people they are today. Both of you will be remembered in our hearts. I miss you both dearly.. and I love u both...

Al-Fatihah to my late grandfather, Allahyarham Raja Azam (Tok Azam) and my late grandmother, Allahyarhamah Raja Fatimah (Tok Naung)... May they rest in peace, and be put into those whom Allah loves and forgives. InsyaAllah...